Workplace Challenges
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Toronto Sun |
OPEN WIDE: A little leftover broccoli hanging from someone's left incisor? "Say, 'I only tell people I consider good friends something like this but ...' and then tell them with a smile. You may also want to tell one on yourself to make them feel better -- like, 'once when giving a speech, I came back from the ladies room and my skirt was tucked in my pantyhose. Thank heavens somebody told me before I got back in front of 2,000 people!' "
BAD BREATH: Short of not breathing, how do you deal with a bellow of bad breath? "Say, 'sometimes I have trouble with my breath and always take a mint.' Take one and then offer them one, too."
FLYING LOW: "If it's your husband or close boyfriend, tell him with a wink. If it's a casual friend who is about to stand and show a little more of himself than he wants shown, you can write 'your fly is open' on a napkin. While handing it to him, say, 'In the theatre, this is what they do as a joke to the actor on stage.' "
DING A LING A LING: Cellphones ringing during meetings or lunch is rude yet common. Says Lowndes, "If theirs rings, say, as a joke, 'Shall I tell them I'm your secretary and you're not in?' Or if that doesn't get the hint across, say, 'Oh, luckily I remembered to turn mine off before we sat down.' "
IT'S IN THE CARDS: Make a winning move with business cards: "When someone gives you theirs, never just plunk it in your purse or pocket. Read it slowly as though you were inspecting a rare gem. Then respectively tuck it away in a safe place like a $100 bill. Your actions won't be forgotten."
SAVE THE BEST FOR LAST: Everyone loves hearing their name but if you say it at the beginning of your phone, e-mail, or live conversation, it loses 90% of its power, she says. "Save it for near the end, and it gives much more punch." It's especially powerful with customer service people; for example, "Thanks, you've been a great help, Bob." And using a friend's or new acquaintance's name at the end of your conversation creates a warmer and deeper bond, adds Lowndes, author of How To Make Anyone Fall in Love With You.
DROP THE WORD 'I': Delete the word "I" as many times as you can from e-mail. For example, "Want to confirm our date" rather than "I want to confirm our date." Lowndes says that the fewer times you use "I" in your messages, the more relevance and punch it has. "In fact, even in conversation, say the word "I" as seldom as possible. Therapists calculate inmates of mental institutions say "I" and "me" 12 times more often than residents of the outside world. As patients' conditions improve, the number of times they use the personal pronoun also diminishes."
SIT IN THE HIGH CHAIR: No, not the baby's one -- the office meeting one. It generates more respect for your ideas, says Lowndes. "Arrive at the gathering early and scan the room for the highest chair. Then place your soon-to-be-more-respected tush upon it," she says. All the chairs the same height? If they're the spinnable type, spin yours up to the highest position. Or, if there is a couch in the meeting room, nonchalantly sit on the arm. "The goal is to be the highest participant in the room so, when you speak, people must look up to you. Just be careful if you think your CEO knows this trick. Then take the second highest seat."
CHAT ATTACK: You spot a chatty colleague but can't make a dash for it. Smile and listen for about 10 seconds -- then say, 'Wow, that sounds so interesting, I'm just finishing up a project. Why don't you come tell me around 6 (quitting time).' You know they won't.
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